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You can't imagine what crap you feel like on the first loading day. I thought, sorta, that it would be fun to just release and eat everything I loved to eat. I gotta say... YUCK!

So far, I've had 2 doughnuts, a chai tea made with whole milk, and about four ounces of macadamia nuts. Later, I've planned a scallop fettuccini alfrado meal. My nutritionalist said that I should eat fats until they sorta made me sick - just that "little bit" has done it. It's nearly lunch time and I have NO desire for food. Seriously. Fatty foods are icky after just a short time. How am I going to make it through the rest of the day today and all day tomorrow??

I still have the rest of the can of macadamia nuts to go (22g of fat per 1 ounce!), several cheeses, a cake with cream cheese frosting that Mom's making, and chips! Just the thought of all that makes me queasy.

Tami, my nutritionalist, says that I have to really, really, really load up so the weight melts later over the next fourty days. I feel like I'm having to endure the 40 days and 40 nights thing and it's only the first day!

Wish me luck - I think I'm going to need it just to keep the food down.

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